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Boy Crisis / Man Crisis

Many have cited a “boy crisis” in U.S. society, evidenced by lower participation in college by boys than girls and higher school drop-out rates. By way of explanation, the authors of a National Endowment for the Arts study noted that “in 1980, students were commonly assigned books by Ernest Hemingway or John Steinbeck. Today, students are more likely to be assigned books by Toni Morrison or Julia Alvarez.” Dead white-male authors telling of wars and such things have been out of favor politically and their works have been removed from the literature courses. But it seems that male students respond more positively to them than to Morrison or Alvarez. This and other attempts to reshape the male identity have succeeded mainly in turning boys off to the educational experience. One-third of young men in the United States between 22 and 34 years of age still live with their parents - a 100% increase in 20 years.

A related phenomenon has to do with church attendance. The book, Why Men Hate Going to Church, by David Murrow contends that the culture of mainstream Christian churches in the United States caters to the sensibilities of women and, as a result, alienate men: “The watershed moment came over a simple disagreement. Murrow had proposed serving coffee in the sanctuary for an adult group meeting, an idea that upset some members. The pastor ruled against serving the coffee. Murrow said he realized that the pastor saw his job as keeping people happy and not taking any chances.” This, said Murrow, illustrates “the feminization of the church.” The goal is to achieve group consensus. Church seminaries teach pastors to be “facilitators”, not leaders. Murrow contends, however, that men would prefer that church leaders take principled stands on issues. Men, he said, “don’t follow religion, philosophy, or ideas .. Men follow men,” Jesus being a prime example. Finding the church a threat to male identity, the author of this book is trying to convince congregations to develop men’s ministries or otherwise adapt to their needs.

Trevor Marsh, 17, was killed last October near the banks of the Mississippi river in an apparent game of Russian roulette. He was a senior at South High School in Minneapolis.

According to a newspaper report, Marsh was killed by a gang member because he falsely claimed to be a member of the Gangster Disciples. This is a predominantly black gang with many members in the Midwest. Marsh was white as was the alleged killer, a 16-year-old named Raine C. Neiss.

Neiss reportedly became angry when Marsh claimed to be a Gangster Disciple member. He put a gun to Marsh’s head saying “the bullet will tell if you are telling the truth.” As luck would have it, there was a bullet in the chamber of the gun. Marsh was killed with a single shot.

A friend of Marsh and high-school classmate, Nick Malia, told reporters that Marsh had pretended to be “a G.D. (Gangster Disciple) ... He always wanted to be accepted, or respected, so he’d lie a lot. He just wanted people to like him more.” When he claimed to be a Gangster Disciple member, he was attacked by three people with connections to the gang. “Don’t mess with the G.D.”, Marsh was told.

According to reports, Marsh made arrangements to meet with his assailants in the afternoon of October 25, 2006. There, near the banks of the Mississippi river, he showed a silver revolver to George M. Boleo, the 25-year-old older brother of the teenager who fired the fatal shot. Boleo unloaded the gun and handed the gun and ammunition back to Marsh. Neiss then grabbed the gun and fired a shot into Trevor Marsh’s head.

After the shooting, Boleo told a friend that his younger brother had now “earned his tear” - i.e. become a real gangster. A tear tattoo under the eye means that you’ve killed someone. It is a kind of merit badge in the gang culture.

(Star Tribune, January 5, 2007, p. B1)

Cho Seung-Hui, the Korean-born student at Virginia Tech who on April 16, 2007, killed 32 students and faculty members before killing himself, fit a typical profile of a mass murderer according to criminologists - "a friendless figure, someone who has been bullied, who blames others and is bent on revenge, a careful planner, a male. And someone who sent up warning signs with his strange behavior long in advance ... He was accused of stalking two women and photographing female students in class with his cell phone. And his violence-filled writings were so distrubing he was removed from one class; professors begged him to get counseling. He rarely looked anyone in the eye and did not talk to even his own roommates." Clearly this was a young man with difficulty relating to women. His own crisis of identity cost many other people their lives.

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